Friday, January 30, 2009


So I’ve been putting a lot of thought into some pretty big things lately.  Long term stuff affecting my entire life.

I was never a very ambitious person.  There was a time when I worked at Pita Pazzaz, was against all things materialistic, and felt that I could live the rest of my life on minimum wage.  My take on it was the less you have, the less you think you need.  But as time went on I realized that was a cop-out, a thought process that ultimately stemmed from fear.

From there I moved back home to take some schooling.  I decided I wanted to move ahead in life, make something of myself.  Just one problem.  I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life.  Deciding I wanted to get ahead only now put me on par with every other directionless schmuck out there.  And that’s how it stayed for years.

For a while I tried my hand at photography.  It was something I loved doing as a hobby, something I felt I was good at, so I figured if I could make it a career I could make good money and also love  my job.

If you love what you do, you’ll never

work a day in your life.

It didn’t quite pan out that way.  I made business cards, made a website, sold prints and even started getting commissioned for family portraits and weddings.  But the further I went down this path the more I realized I wasn’t finding it fulfilling at all.  Photography had been a hobby for me, something I did to get away from it all, and a medium through which I could express my own vision.  Now I had people telling me what they wanted my photography to be, it was a product now.

Eventually I decided photography wasn’t the route for me.  This was a crushing blow, and left me aimless.  And that’s how I stayed for a long time after.  I went on a cross-country road-trip looking for some kind of direction and meaning in life.  Well I did find a lot of things I didn’t know I needed, I didn’t find the things I had left for, and so I returned home still aimless and lost.

Debt forced me to turn up the heat on finding a job that had better pay.  I still had no clear path I wanted to follow, but started to feel like maybe working in a career I loved was a pipe dream and I should just find something with good pay and job security.  I began applying at every decent paying job I could see myself being decent at, paying no regard to whether or not I’d find it rewarding.  The vast majority of people with jobs are just people with jobs, and they get by just fine.  They have a family, a house, and a life they can be happy with.

Then, by pure chance, when asking my cousin if I could live with him in Edmonton since jobs out there paid more, he mentioned Bioware was hiring term testers.  And through the biggest stroke of luck I’ve ever had, I got it.

So I said goodbye to my friends and family and set forth on a 15 hour drive to Edmonton, a new life, even if only temporary.

For the first month I was in a new city and didn’t know anyone.  I was getting by alright, but nothing at all about the experience was rewarding.  My job, while easy, was menial.  I had no social life to speak of.  I missed my friends and family, and all things familiar.

By the time Xmas break came around I was dealing with a heavy case of homesickness.  I’d underestimated just how severe it can be, and was seriously considering quitting Bioware and just going home.  My 2 weeks in Winnipeg was great, I had a lot of fun with my friends, reconnected with a few old ones, and remembered how proud I should be of the life I’d built for myself in Winnipeg.  When it came time to leave it was almost as hard as the first time.

But a weird thing happened when I pulled into Edmonton on the way back.  I caught myself thinking “ahhh, home!”

Over the next little while I began to make real friends at work, and even hang out with them outside of work.  I began getting more responsibility at work which made it infinitely more rewarding and actually found myself LOVING my job.  Sometimes weekends drag on because I’m looking forward to continuing working on what I was on Friday.  I started to feel more like myself again, and the began to come back to me in all aspects of my Edmonton life.

While I was in Winnipeg I got a call about a government job I’d applied to before Edmonton had even been an option.  I scheduled a phone interview since I’d be back in Edmonton by then.  But now I was faced with a dilemma.  Bioware in Edmonton or government in Winnipeg.  Winnipeg offered a higher paying job, a lower cost of living, and my friends and family.  But Bioware was a job I was beginning to truly love, a career I could see myself being ambitious about and excelling at.

The phone interview went well, and that just made the anxiety increase.

But after much though, and some research into what both jobs have to offer both immediately and long term, I’ve all but made up my mind.


This is something I’ve spent my entire adult life looking for, and it’s turning out to better than I ever imagined.  I found out the pay is in fact quite competitive with Winnipeg, and have started to build a social life out here.  I’ve also been getting my name out there and think I could make permanent full time.

So, and this is both bizarre and very hard to say, if I get my way…  I won’t be coming back home.  This is my home now.

I love everyone back in Winnipeg, and would visit often.  It will always be my true home.  But I have to chase my happiness, and I see a real shot at the real thing here.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

New Music For Ya!

Push play on the playlist to the right for some awesome tunes care of me!

  1. We Are Scientists – Ghouls
  2. Pomplamoose – Centrifuge
  3. Noah & The Whale – Give A Little Love
  4. Florence & The Machine – Dog Days Are Over
  5. The Shins – Phantom Limb
  6. Pomplamoose – Hailmary
  7. We Are Scientists – Lethal Enforcer
  8. Swimfaster Godwhispers – One Year Anniversary
  9. Quote – The Pace Of Our Feet
  10. William Fitzsommons – I Don’t Feel It Anymore
  11. VHS Or Beta – Can’t Believe A Single Word
  12. VHS Or Beta – The Stars Where We Came From
  13. Oasis – Falling Down
  14. Ours – God Only Wants You


Just To Show I Don’t Take Myself TOO Seriously


I Like My Tattoos


Ya, I’m a narcissist.  I won’t deny it =P

Sunday, January 25, 2009

In Production

Layers melt away until all I can see are the patterns. The mechanisms in my life are hard at work. As the equations work themselves down to their simplest expressions, I see it all play out. And it all seems so familiar. The faces behind the masks, the meanings behind the words. All those I've always known but never met.

I glide between the orbits, never making contact. Pieces come together, pieces fall apart. I see lone elements on vagrant paths to nowhere, I see overwhelming plans coming to fruition.

It's all so beautiful in its function. It's the art of living. Paint stroke decisions, melodic mistakes, the grammar of emotions.

I wonder the landscape of my past, strolling through the painful times and taking a moment to rest in the pleasant ones. I watch the machine operate as a whole. It doesn't make a sound, flawlessly creating a product never meant to be completed.

Things start to lose their perfection, variables are added to the equations. An uncertain future fractures the landscape. The masks slip back on, the layers are laid down once again. I begin to lose sight of the orbits. As the over-saturated colors of subjectivity begin to fade in from the monochromatic perfection I'd witnessed, I find myself back in the abstract.

I step into the future and let the mechanisms get back to work, and I make some new paint strokes. The melody goes on.


Thursday, January 22, 2009


So I had my phone interview with the government job in Winnipeg yesterday.  It was a half an hour interview with a 5 person panel.  I think it went really well.  If I get on the short list I’ll have to fly back to Winnipeg for some further exercises they do to make their final choice.

If I do get the offer, and I also get a second term offer from Bioware (which looks very very likely) I have some tough choices to make…  All practicality says I should take the government job.  It’s quite a bit more pay than Bioware, and costs of living in Winnipeg are almost HALF of what it is here in Edmonton (and I can’t live with my cousin forever), and with the government it tends to be a career for life.  The only real point for Bioware is that it’s something I’m passionate about, but that’s a major point.

One thing that’s been running through my mind is that I like living in Edmonton right now.  Even a few years I could do no problem.  But long term, I don’t see myself spending the rest of my life here.  If I ever start a family, I’d want it to be in Winnipeg.

So I have some thinking to do…

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Celebrity Crush AND Music!

So this entry is both a “celebrity” crush AND a music entry.  I’ve been following this little indy duet on and off for some time now and I finally decided to shell out $6 and download the EP.  Great stuff.  But the girl in this band is also a major crush.  I doubt she classifies as a celebrity, but none the less.  Here is a video of theirs so listen to the awesome tune, and look at the awesome girl.

Pomplamoose - Hail Mary

New Vest!

A Good Weekend

So things at work continue to go well.  I made up an Excel spreadsheet for something at work and emailed it to everyone on our project, just cause I thought it’d be helpful, and the lead of the entire project emailed me personally thanking me.  And I went for lunch with some of the guys from work, got some awesome pho, and one of them told me they overheard a conversation which sounds like we’ll probably be offered another term.

Yesterday it was +9 out!  Went down around Whyte Av to a pub called Next Act and played a really fun zombie board game and had drinks with a bunch of work friends and their friends.  It was fun, and I can see that Whyte Av is the place to be for good looking girls.  Still not Winnipeg calibre of course ;)

Today it was another beautiful day, so I ran a bunch of errands I’d been putting off.  Returned some movies, deposited some checks, ate at Taco Del Mar and faxed some documents to the government about the job I may have with them.  Phone interview is on Wednesday.

Other than that, I’ve been seriously addicted to Fallout 3 lately.  Seriously fun game.  I leave you with a screenshot from the game which I’m pretty sure is a subtle reference to the good ol’ YTV classic, Reboot.

ScreenShot25 Dot’s Diner!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Love It


Thursday, January 15, 2009


So work has been going well, been taking on as many extra projects as Zack can dish out, been staying late, etc.  I think I’ve been making a good impression.

Got a bunch of mail from Winnipeg redirected here thanks to my Mom.  Got a check from Rogers Video for, get ready, 5 CENTS!  Big spender!  Also got my $100 GST check though, so 100.05 ain’t bad!

I’ve been playing Fallout 3 on PC lately, freakin’ love it.  Totally addicted.  The perfect mixture of FPS and RPG.  Really cool.  And it’s dystopic vision of the future is creepy!

After staying up till 2:00 AM last night playing the game I went out for a smoke before bed.  The girl next door was just getting in, she was all dressed up from being out with friends.  This time I was dressed up nicely too, took her a second to recognize me, lol.  We chatted briefly, but we were both tired.

So Brett got the job working on the rigs, so I’m calling him Rig Pig from now on; apparently that’s a common term in Alberta for people who work on the rigs.  He’s gunna be making mad cash, but I worry about him.  It’s rated the most dangerous job in Canada!  Hopefully it all works out for him.  Won’t be able to hang out with him out here for a while now though, that sucks.

And now I’m gunna get back to making myself some money, my build is almost done updating.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

An Interesting Day

So today started out pretty crappy. I slept in, so didn't have time to gel my hair, I could still make it to work on time, but it'd be close. They don't really care if you're a bit late, but I just missed 2 days on account of a flu, so I didn't want to look like I was never there.

Bill lives in a new area in Edmonton that isn't even on the maps yet, so they never sand our roads or even clear them, and it was warm yesterday and snowed a lot. The wet sticky snow. So long story short, my car got stuck. It was pretty bad. I called CAA and was on hold for a long time, so in the meantime I took the shovel out of my trunk, tried digging out the tires for 40 minutes. Even though it was warm out, after 40 minutes of getting right in the snow, it's still freezing. Eventually Bill and Tia came out to help me. Bill had caught my flu so now he's staying home sick. Eventually we managed to push it out and then I reversed it out of there and took the other way out. Just when CAA finally came through, lol.

So I got to work at 10:30, an hour and a half late. Not good. But Zack didn't seem to mind, he's been stuck before. Still, I was feeling like I'd screwed myself over with the job. I keep getting sick. Supposedly when Bill first moved out here he got sick a lot the first year. Maybe a combination of the polution from the refineries and stuff, plus how dry it gets out here. And then being late today. I felt like I wasn't looking good to the higher ups.

But my bug reports are always really detailed, I always finish my test-plans first, etc. And then today Zack gave me 2 special projects just for me. Right now I'm in my own office installing a demo build and creating savegames to show it off, then tomorrow I have a different project to work on. So hopefully that means I'm being vetted and I prove myself with these next few projects!

And as for why I'm writing a blog entry while I'm supposed to be working on a new project... It's installing and when I asked if there was anything I could do in the meantime Zack said "browse the web!"

Current Music

Been a while since I got some new music, but this is what I’ve been listening to as of late:


Dark Knight OST

This soundtrack by Hans Zimmer and James Newton Howard made the movie.  I love how Joker and Batman each have their own theme that plays throughout the album.


41dnY80139L._SL500_AA240_ The Offspring – Rise and Fall, Rage and Grace

I was a big Offspring fan when I was like 14.  Then my musical tastes expanded, and they sold out.  But this CD actually sounds a bit like their older stuff, and was good to listen to for nostalgia’s sake.



Oasis – Dig Out Your Soul

Never been a big Oasis fan, not that I didn’t like their classics, but this CD is the first of theirs I can say I’m a fan of.  I like it the whole way through.




We Are Scientists – Brain Thrust Mastery

Just found these guys, but really digging it so far.  A video of theirs is at the bottom of this post.




We Are Scientists – After Hours

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Another Video

Video clips from my trip to Winnipeg.

Indescribable Feelings

My last night in Winnipeg, singing at Lime Lite. It was good times!

No End In Sight

Yup, I’m in no short supply of celebrity crushes!

Kari Byron


The cute girl from Myth Busters.  On one of my days back in Winnipeg I just sorta took a day off, and there just happened to be a Myth Busters marathon on, Chad ended up coming over and watching too.  To me, it was a Kari Byron marathon.

Jenna Fischer

Jenna-jenna-fischer-869167_325_402 Pam from The Office!  If Pam, the fictional character she plays, existed in real life, I’d marry her.

Tina Fey

tinafey_21313 But only when she’s NOT playing Sarah Palin!

Sarah Silverman

1388603579_787db23cc9 Not gunna lie, I don’t find her funny in the least.  But I don’t care.

Jennifer Morrison

05-22-07 She plays Dr. Allison Cameron on House.  She doesn’t get nearly enough airtime anymore since she’s part of the “old team”.  I miss her :(

Olivia Wilde

130311.1 She plays 13 on House.  And she’s bi in the show, so my favourite episode had her making out with, count em, TWO other hot girls!

Lisa Edelstein


Lisa Cuddy, also from House.  Who’s a MILF?  You are.  You’re a MILF.

Hugh Laurie

041110_hugh_laurie_11a.widec Who am I kidding?  He’s so dreamy!

Friday, January 9, 2009

Are You Kidding Me!?

I just went out for my second smoke of the day, 10:15 PM…  I’m still in my bright red Coca Cola pajamas, no gelled hair, unshaved, and all around looking like crap.

Wouldn’t you know it, the cute girl is just driving in with a bunch of her cute girlfriends.  She stays outside while everyone goes in and chats with me.   “I’ve never seen you around here!” she says “We should get our puppies together and have a play date!”  COME ON!  I’m standing there looking like total crap, and like a total idiot explain I’m from Winnipeg and the dog isn’t here.  Normally I’d not let a small obstacle like the facts get in the way, but I felt about as good looking as her wiener dog.

I’m never leaving the house like this again.  I don’t care if I’m on my death bed, I’m dressing up before I leave the house.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Sick :(


I had some bizarre dreams last night.  They seemed to go on forever.  The main one was about me driving my car into a lake, just for fun, and sitting in the car while it sank and the water pressure broke in the windows and filled the car.  As the water poured in and the car sank deeper I looked around me and could see through the fading light, other cars piled up at the bottom.  Looks like I wasn’t the first person to think of this.

At no point did I feel I was in danger so when the car was completely filled with water and landed on top of the pile of other cars, I swam out the window and up to the surface, then continued on with my day.  But my dream kept going through everyday life and I began to get frustrated because I didn’t have a car anymore.   Weird dreams.

Eventually I woke up to my alarm and felt like total crap.  I haven’t been getting enough sleep lately, and there’s a bug going around the office so I must have caught it.  I called in sick and spent the day laying in bed in my schnazzy Coca Cola Pajama Pants I got for Xmas and watching downloaded episodes of House.

I went out for a smoke in my Coca Cola pants, and wouldn’t you know it, a cute girl a few door down took her wiener dog for a walk, and there I am standing in my bright red pants.  Lol, we actually ended up chatting for a bit and I told her about Starbuck.

It’s about 8:00 PM and I’m starting to feel better, so looks like I’ll be going in to work tomorrow.  But for now, I’m just bored out of my mind.  Waiting for more House to finish downloading…

Communism & Capitalism

On the ride home from West Edmonton Mall:

Dale:  I’m pretty sure that cute girl in Le Chateau was checking me out.

Brett:  She was, but she’s a communist.

Dale:  What??

Brett:  She had a sickle belt buckle.

Dale:  Damn, that sucks.  Capitalists only for this boy.

Brett:  Communists like to share.  She’d be up for a threesome.

Dale:  And like a true capitalist, more for me!  We both get what we want!

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

New Year’s 2009

Tim made this awesome compilation video of New Year’s in Winnipeg. Such a good time.


I haven’t had a proper sleep since driving through the night to get back.  I’m dying, so exhausted.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Second Half Of My Trip

So my trip back to Winnipeg has come to an end.  I write this from my room in Edmonton.  It was the most fun I’ve had in a long time!  It was great.

Hung out with Ashley again.  She was feeling under the weather so I offered to bring her some chicken noodle soup.  We ended up going out for lunch instead, then she was feeling a bit better so we went to the mall and just joked around as we looked at stuff.

Also got to hang out with Nikki.  We didn’t get a chance to hang out before I left for Edmonton the first time, so it was good seeing her.  Andi and I went to her place and Scott made us Chicken Burgers.  It was fun.  The next day Nikki and I went clothes shopping.  We both bought some pretty nice stuff.  We were going to hang out for New Year’s Eve but Brett, Linda, Tim and I went to a party one of Craig’s friends were having instead.  I hadn’t seen Craig or Lauren yet, so I wanted to see them before I left.

The New Year’s party ended up being a ton of fun.  Brett, Tim and I headed there first, but came back around 11:00 to get Linda.  I invited Kristina cause I knew she was down and no one should be sad on New Year’s!  Plus I wanted someone to kiss at midnight.  So we picked her up too, but with all the driving midnight hit while we were in the car, lol.  It was good fun though.

I ended up getting reaaaally tanked.  I had a lot of fun, and the pictures that came out of the night were awesome.

The trip ended with another night at the Lime Lite.  My trip was sorta book-ended by that place.  It was fun, my personal favourite moment on the night was Chad and I serenading the crowd with our Karaoke version of Whole New World from Aladdin, lol!

That was the last I saw of most of my friends.  I was finding the thought of leaving Winnipeg really hard to accept.  It was so good to be back, I didn’t want to leave again!  Brett wants to work on the rigs so the plan was to come with me for the ride, but somehow the concept that he was actually coming back to Edmonton with me didn’t really sink in, and I felt like I was leaving all my friends behind all over again.  Not easy.

The next morning I checked the weather channel and there were severe warnings against driving.  What luck, after good weather for months, a blizzard right when I come in to Winnipeg, then 2 weeks of fine weather, albeit cold, but then another Blizzard the morning I’m supposed to leave!

I decided to wait the blizzard out this time.  At first I was gunna leave the next morning, but that meant I’d get like no sleep before going back to work.  So we ended up leaving around 5:00 PM, enough time for the blizzard to pass and the roads to be mostly cleared.  Picked Brett up, headed to BK for some food and hit the road.

Oddly enough, this was my first road-trip with someone else.  2 weeks of road-trip in the summer, then to Edmonton and back, all alone.  Having company was a really refreshing change.  Someone to chat with, to point out cool sights to and to drive when you feel like taking a nap!  It was a fun trip.  We drove through the night.

I dropped Brett off at his uncle’s place about 40 minutes outside of Edmonton, then headed to my cousin’s, where I’m staying.  Didn’t get to sleep until 9:00 AM Edmonton time.

Sunday I drove back out and picked up Brett and we spent the day running errands in Edmonton.  It was surreal.  Edmonton had been an independent life, completely separate from Winnipeg.  And now I was driving down Elerslie with Brett to check out the shops in South Ed Common.  We went to Taco Del Mar for food, then back to my place so Brett could set up his new cell phone.  After that I drove him back.  It’s really cool having him out here.

Today was my first day back to work.  My alarm going off at 7:00 AM was hell.  But it was great being back at work.  Oddly enough, even though I’d been dreading leaving Winnipeg again and coming back, this time it feels good to get here.  It was good to see my room again, the familiar drive to and from work.  Saying hi to all my friends at work and exchanging Xmas break stories.

I guess Edmonton is a home to me now too.  I’ve never had 2 homes.  Two places that feel familiar, and uniquely me, yet somehow completely different from one another.