So many people I know are in dark times right now. Struggling just to make it through the day, to make sense of their lives and hold together a narrative that makes it worth it. I get so frustrated with life sometimes. Is it supposed to be this hard? Those good times and care-free memories seem so long ago. A different life, or a dream.
I don’t care how unrealistic it is, or how naïve it makes me. All this change and progress was supposed to be for something better. But we’re all living in the reflected past or the seductive future. The present is just something we bare.
When are the barbeques where we all get together and laugh and smile? When are the long drives and sporadic adventures? The late nights and long weekends? This journey had a goal. There was supposed to be a destination. When do we get to meet each other at our best?
What happened to the love that used to fill our lives?
I can’t stand seeing the people I care about so tormented by their demons, or their circumstances. Worse, I can’t stand seeing it from a distance. Everyone’s waiting. There’s so much separation. I miss them. I miss who I was with them.
Everything is so different now, we’re all so fragmented. We left it all behind to find something better, but now we’re just looking to get it back. I want it back.
I miss my friends.